a story goes on

The story of my life now is going to next chapter.
Dont know when will it end?
But, I always trying to thankful what has ALLAH given to me.
I dont care how hard to accept it.
Well, I just want to be a part of the story.
I'm sure, someday I'll miss this part.
The story when I'm in definitely confused what I feel.
Every moment will be unforgetable.

Anyway, I shy........when I again and again come to ALLAH and say 'I GIVE UP'.
Please let me get what I want. How stupid am I? I dont know what will the best for me, and try to convincing ALLAH that what I want is the best.

Hey....I just have simple request. So...please let me know the reason why should I strive patiently for the simple thing that I want.


TIRED...
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SHORT STORIES

Why do we close eyes when sleep?

Why do we cry?

Why do we imagine?

Due to the most beautiful thing in the world is UNSEEN

When we found someone whose the uniqueness is same with us....

We combine with him/her within same pecualiarity is named of LOVE.

There are some that we dont want to release.

Some people whom we dont want to leave.

But remember..., release IS NOT the end of world....

But the begining of a new life.....

There is happiness to whom it might has been crying alot,

being hurted...

has found...

and to whom it may it might has tried the best.

Because of THEY can apreciate how important person who can touch their life.

Trully LOVE...

Its when your tears flow and STILL CARE to him/her.

Its when he/she doesnt care with you but you are STILL waiting for him/her loyally.

Its when he/she has been starting to love somebody else and you are STILL smiling up to him/her meanwhile says, "I'm taking part of your happiness".

If love is not successful, RELEASE yourself.

Let your heart again spread its wings and fly to the wild.

Remember!

That might be you found love and lost it, but

When that love is die....You dont need to die with him.

The strongest person IS NOT they who always win.

BUT they who keep standing when they fall.

Whether how.......

In life's journey, you learn about yourself

and realise that regret not necessarily happened.

Only the eternal appreciation for the coices of life that has been for you.

The TRUE FRIEND...will be understood when you say "I forget".

Will waiting forever when you says, "Wait me for a moment!"

Keep staying when you say, "Leave me alone!"

Open the door although you've been knocking.

LOVE someone...

IS NOT about how to forget....but how to forgive....

IS NOT about how to listen....but how to understand....

IS NOT about what do you see...but what do you feel....

IS NOT about how to release....but how to KEEP FAITH....

More dangerous drip the tears in the heart than sobbely cry.

The tears can be removed.

But unseen tears makes the wound that will be never lost.

In the love affairs, we are VERY RARE win the love.

But when the love is SINCERE, although you lost but you KEEP WINNING just because you are happy.

Can love someone MORE THAN you love yourself.

The time will arrive, when you have to stop love someone NOT because of that person has stopped to love us.

BUT because of we realise that person will be more happy if we release him/her.

If you really love someone, dont release him/her!

Dont believe that release always means of you really love him/her.

BUT...KEEP STRIVING to get your love.

That is TRUE LOVE.

It will be better waiting for your expected person than walk together with someone's avalaible.

Sometimes, someone who you love is THE MOST person who hurt you.

And sometimes, the friend who cry along you is the love that's not realised by you.

Modesty guide you the strength not the weakness.

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I HATE YOU BUT I MISS YOU...

Do you know a song title by SLANK??? Yeah, 'I HATE YOU BUT I MISS YOU'.

Hahahha...........I know its not only a such of song title but It has recorded a singer moment also. Have you fell that??? Hem......honestly I have.

Now I'm getting realized that what old people said that, " Dont love someone much, Who know someday you'll hate him/her. ANd dont hate someone much, who know He/She will be yours".

Watch up your step!!!

May be you should check it up:

الْأَخِلَّاء يَوْمَئِذٍ بَعْضُهُمْ لِبَعْضٍ عَدُوٌّ إِلَّا الْمُتَّقِينَ

"The friends shall on that day be enemies one to another, except those who guard (against evil)" Q.S. Adz Zukruf: 67

Well, dont love person not for the sake of ALLAH! You'll be disapointed....

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Have you ever in sad?

Please dont disturb with your kinda dreams. I have lost my dreams. And now you offer me your dreams. Hikhikhik...

I could catch how you tried to explain me meanwhile you were so nervous.

" I do what I able to do..."

Aghhhh.......You dont understand anything.

How could you broken all expectations after I ignored all of my dreams???

And I was just silent when you tried to explain so many reasons that made me dizzy-dazling. I couldnt thinking...

CRIED softly and suddenly I was unconscious on my bed and the phone was closed by itself. I was still thinking that it was only everslept. But when I woke up from sleep, I took Wudhu and performed my qiyamul lail. But it was litle bit different than before. DUe to I was really enjoying cried in front of ILLAHI RABB.

When people who knows me that I'm a very positive person asked me 'Have you ever in sad?'

I answered, "ABSOLUTELY YES. By the GOD, I'm in sad now"

Let see, how long I can restrain myself not to get in touch with that person.

YA ALLAH, Please grasp me!!! Dont let me going ashtray by following shaytan

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Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham......

Yeah, Its life. Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham. Here I'm not trying to tell you all about The Bollywood Movie "Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham". But I just want to share about life.

Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham. SOmetimes Happy sometimes Sad. Sadness and happiness come and go. Life is not definitely happy forever, but absolutely not sad all the time. Sad and happy will always accompany your life. It will always makes your life more lively. Life is not beautiful without all those things.

When you are in happiness, please never think that it'll everlasting! Someday, the life is unpredictable. WHo knows after all happiness that happened to us will be replaced by sadness.

When you are in sadness, please never consider that you are th emost miserable person! Trust me! Someday your sadness will move to happiness. SOmeday you might be missing your sadness period.

Success things may be started by failure things. SOmeone who's living in wealthy now may be started from very poor person in the past. SOmeone genius now, may be He/She was stupid person in the past. Someone who loves someone-else alot may be someday He/She will loses his/her lover in the future due to destiny, e.g; death or broken heart.

Should we have big hopes to something or someone??? Well if you expect something or someone to be as your favour. Trust me! you'll be disapointed.

I did that.

But if you expect ALLAH will always give you the best things and you trust it! Insha Allah, you'll never disapointed.

I hate to be someone whoo's expecting someone else will be a part of my dreams. Yeah.......When you created an Idol person in your mind. Yup, READY TO GET DISAPOINTED!!!

Ya Allah, dont let me fall down by stupid expectations!!! Audzubillahiminassyaithanirrajim

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Promise.....

Insha Allah, We'll never forget to say, "I Love You for The Sake Of Allah" on each other Before we separate. So i one of us return to Allah, We'll never regreet due to We are sure that the last word that We say is "I Love you for the sake of Allah".

Herewith my promise to my husband:INSHA ALLAH

• I want to be your fairy in paradise. So I will try my best to be a pious wife.
• I will always love you for the sake of Allah, until return to Allah.
• I will be your loyal follower, due to you are my Imam
• I will be your the sweetest, prettiest, sexiest lady in the world for you. So you'll always counting times to go home.
• I will be good cheef to cook your favourite, till you have no reasons to have dine outside.
• I will be your best partner to share.
• I'll be supermom for our kids.
• I'll stand by you in sadness and happiness.
• I'll be your the only beloved to pass through the time to get Allah's blessings.
• I'll keep silent when you angry.
• I'll let you know when I dislike your attitudes, remind you to keep strive in Allah's path.
• I'll wake u up for qiyamul lail (tahajud) and shaum.
• bla.....bla....bla......

Is there anything else that should I do for you my beloved husband??? If yes. Please let me know! Insha Allah, I'll do as long is allowed in Islam.

But please dont hurt me by doing POLYGAMY.

*** To my husband: Luv you,

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Prayers

Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) says: When a person intends to send a proposal for marriage, he must pray two Rakat prayers, praise Allah and recite the following invocation:

Transliteration:

Bismillah hir Rah'maanir Rah'eem.
Allaahumma inni oreedo an atazawwaja faqaddirli minannisaa-e- a-'affahunna farjawn wa ah'faz'ahunna li fi nafseha wa maali wa aw sa-a'-hunna li rizqan wa a'-z'amahunna li barakatan fi nafseha wa maali anna atroko faqaddirli minha waladan t'ayyaban taj-a'lahu khalafan s'aaleh'an fi h'ayaati wa ba'da mauti.

Translation:

In the name of Allah the Beneficent, the Merciful.
O Allah! I intend to marry. Therefore destine for me the most chaste of women and one who would, for my sake, guard herself and my property. Who shall be most auspicious for increase in sustenance and bounties. Then from her womb bestow a pure son who would be my sweet reminiscence in my life and after my death.

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SCHEDULE's 2007

As usual when the new year begins. I make draft of my targets for this year. I believe that You are what you think all day long

If last year I was so passions to reach my worldly dreams. This year I'll be wiser than before. I have reached many joyful dreams. Now time to thinking my life for hereafter. I'm starting to thinking if death is better than live (but useless), I prefer to die in young age. Obviously, death due to destiny not 'suicide'. What for live if we are useless for our deen and other people. Here are my targets:

1. Start new life to build Sakinah & Mawaddah family.
2. I want to be good wife and follower for my Imaam.
3. I want to be BETTER MOSLEMAH.
4. May 2007 Resign from my job and start my own business. I need money to maintain my charity. If I have no money, how should I give 'them'?
5. Continue School.
6. Go INTERNATIONAL
7. Income at least Rp 20,000,000 per month. Insha Allah, this year will be 1st installment of 2008 pilgrimage to Mecca for my parents.
8. 'Surat Cinta Saiful Malook' will be printed for revision.
9. 'Surat Cinta Saiful Malook' translation in English or Urdu.
10. My next novel will born before Middle of year 2007.
11. Qurban 'cow'
12. Restore small Masjid in my parent's hometown.
13. Pregnant.

At last but not least.........Wallahi, I just want to be a good wife & follower for my lovely Imaam. And being Supermom who has my own money. Ya Allah, please grant my duaa.

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Good luck my lovely Babeh........

Again, BDU has lost the best actor. After Mr. Hafiz Pahlevi now Mr. Armand Karim (Babeh). Well, after we lost our soul...........now we are really lose our spirit. No more:

• Smiley handsome face who always says 'thank you' to everybody.
• funky boss who always wear 'ADIDAS' blue rubber bracelet.
• Unkempt boss who wear sporty dress-code in office (could u imagine a General Manager wore that?)
• kind and generous boss who always pay attention for a little thing to care his team.
• Go home before office dismissal.
• lovely saying in the phone, "Ris...............gak ada apa-apa kan?" or "sip-sip" or "sami-sami"
• unlimited encouraging even for something stupid outrageus.
• someone in GM room, who come earlier in the morning and order 'bubur ayam' an dstart chatting to me.
• Nissan X-trail B 8135 OS who dropped me to Blok M or dropped BDU's team to somewhere else.
• stupid talking about JEWS, ZIONISM, FREE-MANSORY.......or just complained about office political, governmeent policy or.......just chit-chat by Yahoo Messenger.
• Lunch on ROUND TABLE while having conversation.
• Questions, "What does Tini need?" (Tini is our office girl)
• BDU's hang out
• His crispy laughing
• Secreet conversation with Mr. Thomas
• Book's discussion
• leave
• bla..........bla........bla................

And so many pretty memories in BDU that I'll never forget. No separation without meeting. Well down Babeh!!! Wish you all the best there! Never forget our memeories in BDU. We'll miss you........

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